With a broken heart that's still beating. . . .
Just when I think I have a grip on things someone speeds the ride up and all I want to do is get off. Why is the world so cruel?
Why am I forced to listen to a co-worker complain about her children doing trivial things when all I want to do is tell her to shut up. I want to tell her that I would give anything to have a child to complain about. She's so excited that she's "getting rid" of her 3 kids for the entire month of July. She's even gone as far as to tell me to be thankful that I don't have any kids. What I wouldn't give to have 1 healthy normal child, let alone 3.
My period is late. It was due around the 12th. I've tested twice, both time negative. I kept saying I wasn't getting my hopes up - and I tried. I tried really hard but I guess in the background they crept up anyway. I don't know what to do. I want to cry. I want to scream. I want to curl into a ball and stay there forever. I want to be normal. There's nothing anyone can do; I guess it's just not meant to be for me.
1 comment:
Holly I've been sitting here for about twenty minutes trying to come up with the perfect thing to say and it all sounds like crap.
I'm frustrated on your behalf! I get so annoyed with people who seem to genuinely dislike parenthood. Don't get me wrong there are frustrating days and I don't have 3 but I can't imagine being away from Arielle for a month and liking it...after 8 hours I miss her. Not that you want to hear that either sorry :(
My sister was extra late one month too and it was very hard for her. You try to tell yourself that you aren't excited but you can't help but hope just a little bit and that just makes it that much harder when it comes. Again I wish I could say something to make it better I really do...it's really just so unfair!
Know that you have a friend praying for you here sending as many good thoughts and vibes that I can. I can't WAIT for the announcement that I KNOW is coming one day...*hugs from Manitoba!* :)
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